Giving up on words

He groaned as he closed his eyes, gasping when Azaya started moving. It was so hard to argue when Azaya was giving him what he had asked for. To be given these sensations which fed such a long drawn out hunger....

Even if he was in the same position as he had put Azaya in, he moved his hips with Azaya's, wanting more. Wanting it to go deeper, and deeper still. Down into the depths of his very soul if it could.

Azaya managed to shift the angle so that every thrust dove deep to the hilt joining as much as he could. He moved picking up pace as it felt natural. Hips rocking and hard and fast groaning and moving. He closed his eyes as he moved swearing it was incredible that if possible they could join there very beings into one. The sounds Hametsu was making were so very arousing. Azaya looked down at him to be the one allowed to be with him in such a way but his own innocence was shinning through as heat began pooling in his stomach a snow storm kicking up about them as he tried to bring Hametsu to that point by holding on long enough even as he began to twitch he was so very close now....he groaned it would not be long before he found release....and no doubt before Hametsu did. "Ham...ahhn etsu....I don't know how mu..much longer...before I....before i ...." Azayakana said lowly.....groaning

Hametsu opened an eye, letting it roll to look at Azaya as he moaned and worked on trying to form a coherent sentence. When he had finally managed to think around all of the sensations, he spoke lowly, "Don't...stop...." He took a breath, moaning before he continued, "Fuck me...until you...come..."

He himself felt it. The tightening of muscles as the heat began to pool inside him. He was on the edge, nearing the end of his second round. It just felt so damn good that he didn't want it to end just yet.

Azaya nodded at his words as he kept moving he went a while longer before everything tightened up and dropped down. He found release his fingers tensing as his hips jerked with his release. Years ago although it hadn't been anything but oral and the partner then had told him he was a monster fire and ice. Hot and cold he had forgotten about that until this moment as the ice and snow around them reached its peek flowing suddenly up and stopping hanging in the air a moment before it all dropped with the ending of his release....

Hametsu's breath came in visible, puffs every few moments as he collapsed after having once again cried out in release. He had taken everything Azaya had given him and he felt his body thrumming with euphoria. He was somewhere floating on cloud nine now, his breath heavy and his body tired.

He was tired, but not so tired that he couldn't stay awake. After a while of laying there to regain his ability to think, he sat up and turned to look at Azaya and smiled that warm smile of his and told Azaya happily, "This was the most memorable night of my life..." he leaned up and kissed his forehead and got out of bed and headed to the shower. He wasn't worried about the cold, his body was warm, if the steam coming off of his naked frame was any indication. He was just dirty after their tumble and he wanted to shower so he could clean things up and go rest.

Azaya shook his head smiling as Hametsu got up to go shower after saying that. The most memorable  night of his life. He shifted and let his feet hit the frozen floor standing up and stretching he was tired but he was also humming inside. He felt incredible. To him it was amazing that everything happened. He looked over at the bathroom walked up and leaned against the door frame Hametsu was steaming he was so hot. To see him in this winter wonderland was amazing he'd go join him but one he'd chill down the shower water the other....he was enjoying the view of the gorgeous blonde who was cleaning up. "This is a night I will never forget. Your incredible Shoku....and I certainly don't mind the view....."

Hametsu turned to look back at Azaya who had said he liked the view. "Then by all means...please look...look at me until your eyes are sore if that is what you want...but remember...looking has a price to pay too..." he mused before he turned back around before he stepped behind the door of the shower, his frame and body becoming nothing but a distorted figure behind the shower doors.

"To someone like me, who has been 'cursed with the eye of a demon' as some have said, even looking at someone or something has a cost...nothing in my world is free...everything has a cost...as did my life here in the Yakuza..."

Azaya looked at him as he said to look until his eyes were sore but to remember everything comes with a price. His cursed eyes his joining the Yakuza all of it. Azaya looked at the distorted figure through the glass turning his palm as snow and ice floated above his palm before looking back up at him. "If I must pay a price to look at you I will. To touch you to have you. You who are said to be cursed with demon eyes. Normally when I am like this those I touch freeze solid and shatter...I will pay the price Shoku because I am unwilling to let you go." 

Hametsu sighed as he leaned his head against the wall and let the warm shower wash over his frame. "You may be willing to pay the price to be with me...but some were not so lucky as to have that choice...and others....have chosen to abandon me as I did my name..." he said lowly, eyes closed. His hair hung around his face, some strands being difficult and clung to his skin.

"Do you know my story truly Azaya?" he asked after a long while of nothing but silence. The only sound to be heard was the sound of the running water. He hadn't told anyone about his past, hadn't told them where he even came from. Only ever told Jaaku.

Azaya listened to him speak as.he stepped into the bathroom fully and shut the door to trap the warmth of the shower into the room. Seeing the way Hametsu was standing as if a heavy burden were suddenly upon him he walked all the way in and stepped into.the shower it was his turn to start steaming. He looked at the back of his lover before speaking from right behind him "No you haven't told me about your past nor have i pried into it. You can tell me anything Kokushoku but know this no matter what is in your past there is nothing you could.have done or had done to you that will make me leave you. Not when I.have finally been able to sort out my own issues to gain you. You can entrust me with the depths of your heart and soul. The only way you'll be rid of me now is if you youeself kill me no one else nothing else will take that from you now." Azaya said as he looked at his strong back. He leaned against the shower wall looking at him and crossed his arms. "Tell me your past. Tell me the cost of lovinf you so that I can pay it and so much more. Whatever the price because you do not have the eyes of a demon to me...such beautiful eyes...i love your eyes and all that you are. You'll have to covince me your eyes that you are so.cursed..." Azaya said and then fell silent waiting for his story for his...past...for him to make Azaya believe he was a man so heavily cursed...when even knowing a little bit of what Shoku's eyes could do. What he could dobhe didn't see a.cursed man but a beautiful vampire.

He turned to face Azaya and looked at him for a long while before he sighed and shook his head. "It's not so much a price for being my lover, nor my friend...this price...is for family alone..." he explained lowly as he looked at his lover. "I had a name once...a name that I had long abandoned before Jaaku found me roaming this city...my birth name was Mirada de Oro..." he began and move up to put a hand on Azaya's face.

"I'm originally from Spain. I was born in a middle class family and I had a younger brother...unlike me, he chose to work instead of go to school. He worked in the mines and died in them as well...my brother was only 15...it damn near killed me then...but my parents didn't care. They noticed only him...and once he was gone, they sent me off to some apartment and paid for my school and my living expenses...they paid me to stay away from them Azaya...do you know why?" he asked before he answered without giving Azaya time to answer, "They were horrified when they saw my eye...called me Hijo del diablo...Son of the devil...I had come into my powers when I was 10 and they were terrified...my father had never told her of the vampire blood in his veins...had never told her...that one of her sons had the chance of either being born like him, being born a human, or being born a vampire...I was disowned all because my father wanted to keep his secret...no one told me what I was..."

Hametsu let go of Azaya now as he looked down at the pooling water that ran down the drain. "When I was old enough, I abandoned my family name, left my home country and came here with rumors that there had existed a king that could help me...but...after two years of searching, I gave up. That was when Jaak found me...I've been here ever since..."

Azaya listened to him. Being disowned because his father wanted to keep a secret, came here searching for the king who could help him but gave it up. Because he came into his powers at the age of ten. Because his father had vampiric blood running through his veins. He suffered. Azaya stepped down and closed the distance reaching up and catching his face in his hands. He ran his thumb under the eye that Hametsu hide. The eye that earned him that nickname that title. 

Azaya had his own titles Ice Lord being the nice one. Until Hametsu if he fell in love he froze his lover solid and the shattered and the one who managed to make it and survive called him a frozen monster an demon of fire and ice. No he knew what it was like to be judged leaning up he kissed the 'cursed' eye closing his own for a moment. "That is a cross you should not have been made to carry all in order to keep to a secret." He said shaking his head. 

Azaya looked at him. "Mirada de Oro...." He repeated looking at him. "The name you choose to go by now is up to you, but you will always have a family and a home so long as I am alive...where ever I am I want you there."

"I don't know what it feels like to be in that situation....my birth name was Hotoke Wairua....its Maori and means Winter Spirit. My family was kingitanga royalty among the high council. We were the family of ice and snow. I had a twin sister. In order to keep the blood line pure I would be made to marry her and sire a child with her after a year had passed."

Azaya sighed as he let go of Hametsu and stepped back against the shower wall again. "My father was kind to the human servants but because I was to one day take his place he made certain to horde his position over me. So long as he was head if house I was his heir and his dog. I could never touch him with anything over then my mouth and upon command I was to take him however he pleased in order to train me up to be the proper head of house when the time came. And to ensure I would know what I was doing when I was made to take my sister. You were the first to join with me in such a way.  I learned to speak read write and perform in the bed at the same time. Wither that was for him or my mother did not matter. I was beaten to ensure I could be colder then the ice that flows through my veins. At five months the council discovered the Hirazuki Diamonds my clan produces through extreme emotions my father packed up the estate and moved us to Japan."

"The beatings and training continued. Just shy if a year the council found us here. My mother pregnant with either mine or my father's child was slowly tortured to death before my eyes. My sister was outright killed while two held me down and a third played with me attempting to force me to produce the tears. My father furious devistated the wooded area destroying its natural balance and turned the deep woods we lived in here in Japan into a eternal frozen winter wonderland. But the men who survived that killed him ripping out his heart. It was then Jaaku happened by killing off the last few."

 "I do not know his much Jaaku knows but he has never asked or talked about knowing what went on in my home behind closed doors. But I was brought before Sarubia who seemed to see right through me knew what I had gone through and let me yell my story at him. He offered me a home if I signed my life to him in blood a year old on the dot and I did. From there I was punished for being full of hate as he worked to bring me out if what my father had done to love and care about those around me... In order to reach me perhaps when I signed my life in blood to him binding myself to him and being warned what it meant he changed a few things. He told me my life as Hotoke was gone that as far as the world would know he died with his family in those woods...that my name from that day forward was Azayakana Sanjo...and that he would beat the remained if Hotoke out of me if he had to but that I would learn what it was to be truly alive. That he had the right to name me as my father now and to displine me as his unruly child.... As I said there is nothing you can tell me Shoku that will make me let you go. No matter what name you go by....no matter what anyone says I love you."

Azaya wrapped his arms about his own waist. "And now you know why.... I couldn't handle you being above me why I desperately need you to walk equal at my side....not beneath me you'll never be there....but beside me were I can reach out and be able to touch you...because if your above me....I can't reach you at all simply take whatever you throw at me....I need to be able to reach you....to hold and be held by you....I need Hotoke to stay dead which is why you...who I desperately love...I need to be able to always reach out and touch you....but that isn't fair to you...your skills your strengths you should be allowed to soar not be trapped on the ground by me which is why....I pushed you away....when all I wanted was to pull you to me and never let go."

Hametsu had closed his eyes when he felt the kiss over his eye. It was such a warm welcome compared to what he had grown up to. He was always looked at in horror when his other eye was exposed. This was wonderful. However he knew now why he had been so attracted to Azaya. They were, in a sense, one in the same. Raised by a Yakuza leader, given a new name when they had none, and given them a new family when their true ones pushed them aside or gave them hell before they left or were given a second chance.

He actually smiled at Azaya, even though he had just told him this horrible story about his past. He moved in and wrapped his arms around Hametsu and hugged him tightly. "Even now you amaze me...it's so strange having someone like you open up my eyes and make me see why I'm so damn in love with you..."

"I'm not that amazing.....just incredibly lucky to have met you.  and to have you be the one I fell in love with." Azaya answered holding him in return. Two broken souls brought together and they clicked. Even without telling each other there individual pasts. "Just..promise me that even if its here in private you won't feel the need to hide anything from me....especially those beautiful eyes of yours." He said and it was as he felt. Hamestu didn't need to hide his eyes from Azaya because they were part of him and his eyes was one of many things he loved about him.

Hametsu chuckled and stayed in the embrace for a long time, just to enjoy the company and the closeness. "Luck doesn't matter..." he told him lowly as he moved back to look at Azaya and smiled warmly.

"I usually hate promises...but for you...I'll promise this. I will no longer hide it...as long as you request I show my eye, I will keep the patch off..." he promised lowly as he looked down at Azaya.

Azaya looked up at him being smaller then him. But he looked at those eyes which were no longer hidden either of them. He reached up once again brushing his fingers around that eye smiling and nodding. "You shouldn't ever need to hide your eyes there beautiful because your soul dances in them." He said leaning up and kissing Hametsu passionately on the lips.

He rested against him kissing him. To not hide that eye anymore to not hide himself away anymore. It was almost more then he could ask for.